Lawline Office Basketball League

Lawline Staff | December 22, 2010

Last month, the California Room had the inaugural Lawline Nerf Basketball Association (or LNBA) tournament.  A grueling season was played between Jake, Joey, Pat, and Training.  Standings went back and forth for most of the season, though during the last couple of weeks Pat and Training pulled away (with Training locking up a first round bye), leaving Jake and Joey to fight it out for the final playoff spot.  It came down to the lastgame of the year, a quintuple overtime affair where both contenders missed their first 4 of 5 shots ("pulling a Shaq", as Jake would breathlessly saying with a shrug after the game concluded).  Jake hit his last shot, but Joey was not about to go home quietly,

hitting nothing but net and beginning overtime.  Back and forth they went, each hitting their next 4 shots.  Jake then bounced one off the rim, giving Joey the opening he needed.  In went his 5th straight shot, and out went Jake from the playoffs.  When reached for comment about how such a promising season went south so fast, all Jake could muster was "We're going to come back strong next year.  I feel very strong about our draft prospects.  Training's getting old, I don't think he has it in him anymore, so you'll be hearing from me again soon".

The first round of the playoffs featured Joey taking an early lead on Pat, but the big man from the Hamptons dominated on his home court from then on and sent the scrappy young team home, a Cinderella story with no glass slipper.  A sweaty Joey said "I have nothing to be embarrassed about.  I left it all out on the court, and I'm just going to come back and work twice as hard next year".

The finals were a match for the ages.  Pat and Training stayed close the whole way, but age came before beauty and soon Training "Training" Training was crowned the first LNBA champ.  The beaten down Pat had nothing to say, a single tear forming in his eye, but the champ was downright chatty.  "It was a hard fought battle.  There was a lot of controversy and a lot of doubt.  A lot of people saw me and thought I was too old, I was too slow, I was too dumb, and that it couldn't be done.  But I fought through all the adversity, prevailed, and sit on top of the world.  This one's for all the doubters".

Camp is just now beginning for Season 2, with a scrappy young team led by Jason "Drama" Dion hoping to make some noise.  Will he?  Stay tuned to find out!

Joey is a Salesperson with  He is also a film critic.  You can see some of his posts at

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